Penultimate Friday

11 Dec

I had to walk to the station today as I had left a minute or two late and missed the bus convoy that comes along all together in a group of three or four and now I’m sweating buckets as it isn’t cold and the heating is on on the train. Ball airer arrived again today – didn’t mention him yesterday but he was there – and again, the same as yesterday, he has a bag of crisps in his portly trotter and shovelling them into his gob foe breakfast. Vile specimen. I have realised now that new Posh Pikey seems to have done a bunk as I haven’t had the misfortune of seeing his contorted mush since he spoke to me and got the sneer of all sneers in return and I think that was Monday of last week so that is a result. If he stays away that will be perfect and it is just ball airer that needs to start getting the 7.51 again as standard and I will be happy. Fat Grace Jones is a thing of the past, as are the Tweedles, kid with a death wish, kid with a rats tail, foreign kid with a handbag and her mobile, Plumstead gay, Posh Pikey and now apparently new Posh Pikey have all gone. It’s amazing what a bad attitude and quick wit can do in life – look at that success rate. It is like I have exorcised the platform of all stupid beings. I am available to carry out this service at a platform near you for a small fee. Today is indeed my penultimate Friday on a Southeastern commute and so after today I only have ten more train commutes left – hurrah. The time off will fly by and I will be back on board before I know it – boo. Time to post as the pant wetters of Westcombe Park are about to board gagging for a seat.


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