26 Mar

I have been brave today and I brought an umbrella with me on my walk to the station. I only did it as it wasn’t windy so I knew I was going to be safe. I saw a man stood at the bus stop as I passed in a Bay City Rollers style tartan suit and an umbrella up… And he was under the bus shelter. What a fuckwit? Same thing happened at the station though where people were stood under the roof covered area with their umbrellas up – lights on, nobody home. Posh Pikey arrived with a huge umbrella and his leather gloves so he must have thought it was icy cold today despite it being almost April. He made a big show of shaking the rain off the huge brolly as he stood under the shelter, and then started banging it against his hand as it was rolled up to make sure all the wet was off. Shit loads left of course as he is a fuckwit so I hope he ends up with a damp leg. Fat Grace Jones was there and chose today as a day to showcase her legs as she had a skirt on. Looked like a couple of chipolatas shoved up under a napkin – and she had on knee high boots that always look dodgy on fat birds. I have had the rare pleasure of getting straight into a window seat this morning without having to move a VIB and owner hogging the aisle seat. Spotted it as the train pulled in and went straight for it. I have the boy of questionable sexuality next to me – not mentioned him before as he isn’t an annoying little fuckwit but I can share him today as he is part of my journey. He is at the station every day with his Mum and wears a Wicked the Musical lanyard – he is also very pretty and dainty and so I have concluded that he is a gay and so I should really befriend him. Just witnessed a zombie at Westcombe Park tear herself away from her phone to launch for the train doors just as they were closing. What a fuckwit. I’m posting now as my arm is aching.

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