Out Of Line

The 7.41 may have arrived on time this morning but it didn’t stop at the platform in its usual place and so I was last to get on, behind the scabby ball airer and the Posh Pikey prick. I had got there before both of them. I even stood airing my fanny to take up more room when I saw the ball airer strolling across the foot bridge in my direction. He still came and stood inside me while he waited for the train. I have the misfortune of now sitting next to another ball airer on the inside seat who must air his balls as his phone is using them as a table – why do men always play with their phones while is it positioned where their cock would be if it was out?  It happens all the time. His legs are wide open and I am perching my ass cheeks on 2/3rds of the seat to his left while he spreads out to play fucking golf on his phone. My bus home last night was pure hell. I got off at Woolwich Arsenal because I checked and a bus from Abbey Wood would have meant a 29 minute wait. I hopped off at Woolwich and skipped across the road to a 422 that was empty and was just pulling in. Got a seat which is great and then hell happened. Woman came to sit in front who was on her phone – I have seen her around and she is visually impaired but apparently this means that she has to shout at the top of her fucking voice on the phone. She was going on about something important or so I thought at first. Saying things about a battle and it’s going to be really hard. Then is transpired that she was in fact prompting someone on the phone how to play a fucking computer game and then proceeded to bellow instructions that she had printed off the internet in massive text so she could read it. Wrong to punch someone with a white stick but sometimes it is necessary because blind people can be wankers too. It got worse when I finally got up to get off. I stood by the door and I turned to my left and my eyes were melted by someone with killer garlic breath and then I turned to the right to escape that and my eyes and ears were met by a man slumped into the corner while standing and who kept on belching. Now, once is acceptable because it can sometimes just slip out but this was on and on and on. Not even a hint of remorse from the fucker so we we pulled in to the stop and the doors opened he was told “we aren’t in your bedroom you dirty fucking wanker, we are on a bus” and with that I was off. Ranted to myself all the way home but it was worth it. Time to post as we are filling up with fuckwits who like to rest their asses on she shoulders of those sitting down and I need to get my cattle prod out to stop that practice immidiately.