Oh Cramp

22 Jul

I managed to not have to trot again last night but the trotting has led to cramp overnight in my calf which is now still hurting. It was a brutal pain that gripped me and twisted my leg until I got up and danced around at about five this morning. It has subsided slightly now I walked to the station but I am a bit worried about it ceasing up again after sitting down for the journey. This journey is going to be evil. Sitting next to the Oompa Lumpa mother who has the paper open on her lap but is just staring whimsically out of the window in an attempt to take the pain of fuckery away. Behind me is a snotty fucker who is leaning forward in his seat to read the paper across his knees and so every time he sniffs and coughs up copious amounts of phlegm, it is right in my ear. Just choke, mate, and keep it quiet. Man sitting nearby who is using his generic Apple headphones as a hands free and he is holding the microphone part between his teeth and is speaking like a ventriloquist. Oh, no now he is holding the hands free to his mouth while his other hand is holding the phone. Jesus Christ how can you misuse something so badly? I managed to get my train ticket for Dartford to avoid the Nazis there who revel in catching people out who think they can use an Oyster to get out. They are really nasty about it. I know a few people who have been caught there before and it really does delay your journey so you have to sort it before so I’m glad that is exactly what I did. I am a tad tired after a night of revelry with the Lady of Lee and Dame Sparkles but I shall persevere. I don’t feel too bad for it and coffee is waiting at work for me. I think I’m going to post now so I can drown out the snotty fucker behind before he drowns me in his bodily fluids. Until this evening, my dahlings.

Sorry for the spelling mistakes but it was posted with WordPress for BlackBerry dahling.



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