Tube Wankers

29 Apr


The station is rammed with people who aren’t used to being here this early and who are all milling about looking for the train times instead of just going to the platform edge and waiting in prime position. As I walked through the ticket office to these slow pricks I just said outloud “7.41, 7.51, 8.01, 8.21…” and as always a complete blank as they never fathom that I am addressing them. The two benefits mothers were on the opposite platform expecting priority with their massive prams containing Pele and Alaska (those are genuine names I heard kids being called way back when in Woolwich one day) and would kick up a fuss if they weren’t allowed. Thank fuck they didn’t take a chance on my train because I wouldn’t be kind to them. VIB wanker below who may have his many cases on the floor but he has an empty seat on the inside and in order to get in there it is going to be a proper nightmare so I doubt people will ask. Posh Pikey just arrived in time and then his friend – a Tinie Tempah wannabe person – came and engaged in conversation but they didn’t get on the train and sit next to each other. Obviously not friends properly then, more acquaintances and neither want to be seen with each other. I don’t blame them because both are pretty low down in the food chain. I believe that I am sitting next to the mother of Oompa Lumpa who I haven’t seen for a while – perhaps Amy Childs wannabe got her a job in Canary Wharf and they can travel there together covering their fellow commuters in orange dust and ensuring they are ready to stab their own eardrums to escape the hell of their voices. So far the train is no more busy that usual but then I did see that the tubes are mostly running today. Man with the bags is going to be asked to shift soon – that will be fun. It will be someone at Maze Hill I reckon that will ask as they are the station that usually has no seats but saying that we are still pretty peppered with empty seats for the morons to use… we shall see. I’m going to post now as I want the ipod to assist me on my trip.


Sorry for the spelling mistakes but it was posted with WordPress for BlackBerry dahling.


One Response to “Tube Wankers”

  1. livesofcommuters April 29, 2014 at 1:16 pm #

    Reblogged this on livesofcommuters.

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